Rob Enderle Believes Apple has Black Helicopters

Rob Enderle (a first ballot FUD hall of famer) posted the most ludicrous pile of crap in his long, long, history of crap. I mean MoD actually is concerned for the mental health of the Enderle Group (maybe the strain of being a group of one has finally gotten to him?). The article’s title is all that is needed to show our concern, “Apple Didn’t Beat Microsoft, Robbie Bach Did: Apple’s Secret 5th Column”

If the MoD was going to embed an MP3 for this article it would surely be the great song by the Kinks, “Destroyer”, but instead we will quote some choice lyrics from Mr. Davies for those unfamiliar with the song.

“You blowing it all with paranoia       You’re so insecure you self-destroyer

(And it goes like this, here it goes)     Paranoia, the destroyer
(Here it goes again)                              Paranoia, the destroyer

Dr. Dr. help me please, I know you’ll understand     There’s a time device inside of me, I’m a self-destructin’ man

There’s a red, under my bed                                        And there’s a little green man in my head

And he said, “you’re not goin’ crazy, you’re just a bit sad      ‘Cause there’s a man in ya, knawin’ ya, tearin’ ya into two.”

Basically, Enderle’s level of paranoia over Apple has reached critical medical levels.

In this article, Enderle all but accuses retiring head of entertainment products at Microsoft Robbie Bach of deliberately sabotaging efforts to combat the iPod. In the Enderle world, it’s not possible that Apple outworked, out marketed, out -innovated, and out-executed Microsoft. No for Apple to have continually beat Microsoft at a product, after developing a market which Microsoft could copy, is a sign of massive corporate sabotage.

The universal maxim of the Enderle Microsoft world is forever stuck in the 80/90s. Microsoft with all of their money and influence will be able to create good enough counterparts to any product that either creates or leads a new market. The maxim believes that since Microsoft was able to dominate and crush Apple and others in the desktop OS business, the same end game will play out in video games, search applications, browsers, media players, and smartphones. Nothing shakes the confidence in this maxim, patience must be maintained because MS will eventually win out. Enderle is not alone in being an adherent to this maxim, the newest believers are the Android is Windows and iPhone is the Mac sect. Despite obvious significant differences between the two “conflicts”, it hasn’t stopped a myriad of pundits from claiming that Apple will lose again.

Well the maxim is now crumbling all around Enderle, but it cannot be abandoned or replaced with a new ideology. Instead, it’s clear Microsoft would have won, but Apple terrorists disguised as Microsoft employees derailed Microsoft’s efforts. It’s like Mack Brown explanation for losing a college game football by stating that his team didn’t lose, they just ran out of time. It’s hard to really channel the Enderle maxim so here’s some of thought, ” Zune killed off PlaysForSure — the application of Microsoft’s successful horizontal model in the iPod space. After massive spending, it occupies a small fraction of the market today and serves only to allow Apple to argue that it isn’t really a monopoly. Zune actually helps Apple more than hurts it, as it faces its own antitrust issues.” In what fantasy land was PlaysForSure going to work? Enderle is rewriting history completely. Microsoft only ran to the Zune strategy because of the outright failure of their previous Wintel like model for MP3 players. And Zune maybe a failure, but it’s almost exactly the same failure in terms of sales that PlaysForSure was.

More lunacy this time directed towards the XBox (which might be the only non Windows product MS has launched in two decades that is somewhat successful), “Xbox initially was a hedge against a threat from Sony (NYSE: SNE) that never actually emerged. It siphoned away gaming resources from Windows, pissed off the OEMS (it is seen as basically a Microsoft PC by them) and effectively eliminated the high end of the Windows PC market. Apple now has about 90 percent of the high-end PC market.”  Again, Enderle is rewriting history, dedicated gaming consoles were always going to take away a large market away from gaming PCs. A $300 dollar gaming console was always going to destroy a $800 or $900 dollar dedicated gaming PC, especially factoring in the dominance of flat panel TVs in living rooms.

In his last attack, Enderle asserts that Windows Phone 7 is the latest attempt by Apple insiders to derail Windows Mobile. Now Windows Phone 7 is a huge gamble, and MoD is on the fence about the overall GUI and strategy, but it was MS’ only play in smartphones. Windows Mobile 6.x was an absolute disaster incapable of challenging Android or the iPhone OS. That fact is ignored by Enderle.

MoD will leave our readers with the one of the last paragraphs of this complete reality meltdown

“In total, that’s an impressive number of accidents, which suggests to me they might not be accidents. What do you think? Is Jobs that good? Steve Ballmer has stepped in personally, and as Windows 7’s success would indicate, he can do impressive work when focused — but does Steve Jobs have other folks in Microsoft working to ensure Ballmer fails?”

Paranoia, the destroyer, and it goes like this….

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